Looking on a demo against nuclear power plants

A loud music with drums and shouts were approaching to the street near the cafe where we sat talking.
'Hmm, they're gonna kill me if they find me.' I joked. Chris seemed curious that march and left his seat to take some pictures for that. The banners they hanged up showed a word 'Fukushima'. Even some little children also joined the demo. I was guessing they exactly don't know the cause of what their parents are doing. I saw that kind of demo three times here, keenly realizing that it's different from Japanese disposition. People here often observed and were surprised at an attitude of Japanese after the quake by characterizing 'calm'. But I just think that such attitude implies 'resigning themselves'. We Japanese just passively tend to accept a reality in front of us, by which we have thoughtlessly accepted various religions, Western culture, and the defeat after WWII and so on. After accepting this, they look like stop thinking or suspecting. This character basically has not changed since Ruth Benedict pierced and categorized it as haji, giri(gimu), ninjyou etc in her book 'The Chrysanthemum and the Sword'. As I was thinking those kind of things, Chris came back with his camera, EOS-1. That camera diverted my thinking and reminded me one of my friends, Yuji who loved the same one.

great buddha's birthday

In this sunny day and clear sky, soft breeze sends slight sweet scent of flowers as I wheel my bicycle. I love this season in which I was born. Most people forget or don't know what day it is today, but only a precious person cares of and celebrates me from the far eastern. I spent roughly half of man's life (in my criterion), frankly deeply appreciating that I can still seek what I love with living up to my ideals even at this age.

I'm pleased to inform you...

Finally, this week, I got acceptance of my work that is the first work here for me (and the first correspondence) as well as in our workplace after moving to the Univ. Today I announced to celebrate this in a rather reserved manner...For that I am really reluctant to prepare food and drink stuffs by myself if I faithfully follow the custom here in this country. Hmm, Japanese sake, sushi, or champagne whatever, I hate to waste time to prepare these stuffs at the expense of my works. But I have no way to avoid since I should behave socially.. As I was writing now I realized that writing my feelings in English tends to grumble, which is not the case in Japanese but rather cited with positive thoughts. Anyway, I can bit sleep well for the time being.

I'd hate to change twice. It's so boring.

最近、辞めるのがはやりだ。若いボスがプレッシャーや人生の意味を考えて本職をやめたり、同僚が別の職種に就くために職場を去って行く。今週もまたひとりこの世界を去ると決めた人がいる。この世界(あるいはどんな職にしても)去って行く人の兆候は、日頃の言動からだいたい勘で分かる。ふっきれたか諦めのような態度が、本人が気をつけても、気づかぬうちにでているからだ。今回も突然ではあったが、聞いて驚きはない。ただ何かゲームのようだと思う。こらえきれず脱落していく参加者を冷淡に横目で流しながら、少しの罵倒と憤り、寂しさを感じながら次のステップに集中する。そして、まだまだ覚悟と考えが足りねーんだよと自分に罵る。

downer

どうもこちらの日本人の同僚の方がdepressionのようだ。仕事の哲学がないままに、現実をつきつけられすぎたのかもしれない。
　　　　日本の現状は、私の生き方や今後の人生の変更を間接的に迫る。今後の政策を考えると、もう将来の落ち着き場所を日本に求めるのは少し難しいことが予想できる。このまま、日本にさよならする覚悟もしておこう。
　　　　ボスとの将来の話、仕事の最終打ち合わせ、出張先での交流、言葉にしてもしきれない貴重な毎日を粛々とこなす。

あと二ヶ月と六ヶ月で

一、二日で２つの別件の英文書類を提出し、報告し、それが終わると同業者の会合。その後は無意識に気が抜けたのか、帰ったら自然と身体がベットに向かう日が続く。はやり気力というのは、体力と直結していると思う。
　　　提携先のボスと昼食を伴にして仕事に関しての意見交換をする。その中で、「今から２ヶ月後に仕事を仕上げよう。２ヶ月以内にね。」との話がつき、次の仕事をやっつける覚悟ができる。やはり締め切りを設けられると気持ちが引き締まる。３つ目の仕事も私の中では、今から半年を目処にまとめるように期限を設けている。
　　　期限を設けることは、終わらせるにあたっての最適で具体的処置(目的)をたてることも迫られるので、仕事の効率がいい。また、見通しがきいて気分のいいものだ。しかし、少し気づくのが遅すぎた感はある。

初作品

意外と感動がないものだ。私の仕事がとりあえず一つ世に近々出る手前の段階となり、こういう状況になると感慨深いと期待していたのだが。今回は仕事場が移転して初、同僚を出し抜いて初、私が独力でやった初の仕事なのに心が動かない。やはり仕事は大きくないといけない。今２つの仕事を大きく仕上げたらすごくすっきりしそうだ。